"The only thing to fear is fear itself" yet I'm finding I am more fearful of myself.
I'm hermit-ting.
I feel as if I belong in a cage of crabs at some rinky dink beach gift shop.
I'm weary, yet energized.
I'm cumbersome, yet slightly hopeful.
What that hope comes from or what it exist for is a question un-answered.
This past year has been an emotional battle of self worth, life, and purpose.
I've lost a friends, I've lost myself, I've lost connections to the world that surrounds me.
People have come and gone like movers in a revolving door.
As quickly as they come in they are soon gone and I am left in the foreground watching in silence.
In submissive compliance.
NO longer is there charisma, sensations are numb, feelings numb. I feel as if my cervical plexus has been severed and my nerves no longer feel what use to feel good.
Love is a strong word. A feeling meant to make this world good and give purpose to this life we live.
It can be the warmth that saves you from bitter coldness or the silencing death of the solar sun that once shed itself upon you.
I am reaching in the darkness for him, searching for his hand to grab a hold of me tightly and willing pull my weary body into his safe haven.
Of those that have come and silently gone he is the one I refuse to let go.
Like a beggar I wait. Hoping for his gift.
Love.
At times like these helplessness becomes a battle overcome only by the help of others.
Help me help myself.
I'm hermit-ting.
I feel as if I belong in a cage of crabs at some rinky dink beach gift shop.
I'm weary, yet energized.
I'm cumbersome, yet slightly hopeful.
What that hope comes from or what it exist for is a question un-answered.
This past year has been an emotional battle of self worth, life, and purpose.
I've lost a friends, I've lost myself, I've lost connections to the world that surrounds me.
People have come and gone like movers in a revolving door.
As quickly as they come in they are soon gone and I am left in the foreground watching in silence.
In submissive compliance.
NO longer is there charisma, sensations are numb, feelings numb. I feel as if my cervical plexus has been severed and my nerves no longer feel what use to feel good.
Love is a strong word. A feeling meant to make this world good and give purpose to this life we live.
It can be the warmth that saves you from bitter coldness or the silencing death of the solar sun that once shed itself upon you.
I am reaching in the darkness for him, searching for his hand to grab a hold of me tightly and willing pull my weary body into his safe haven.
Of those that have come and silently gone he is the one I refuse to let go.
Like a beggar I wait. Hoping for his gift.
Love.
At times like these helplessness becomes a battle overcome only by the help of others.
Help me help myself.
